A letter for the broken hearted 

Maybe you needed this as much as I did. Thank you for reminding me that some tears are happy.  Macaile, I often think where my life would be if my sister hadn’t passed away 7 years ago. I can promise you I wouldn’t be sitting here in front of the pacific ocean looking over the […]

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he’ll listen, but he will already know.

  I remember wishing more than anything for my dad to visit me in my dreams after he passed away. I almost felt angry when friends or family told me that he was in theirs, like I was being cheated out of seeing him, or he was choosing to visit other people first, or maybe […]

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so here I am, surviving.

I promised myself I would start writing again. I thought it would help. Force me to talk about the things I was feeling with paper the way I used to. Writing was one of the only things that truly understood me for a really long time. So, I said it was time to start back […]

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An angel named Steve

  When we lose someone we love, we begin clinging to our memories and reaching for any and all signs that our loved one is still with us. We begin finding hope in feathers and 11:11 wishes and songs on the radio we swear had to have been divinely intervened. Sometimes puzzle pieces fall from […]

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If I never knew my dad; {I’ve decided this:}

  Grief does some crazy things to a person, and sometimes the very pit of the grief is enough to make you think, do, and feel things that would otherwise be unimaginable (like wondering if life would be better now if I never knew my dad from the start.) I’ve decided this. If I never […]

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the only way out is in.

It’s amazing how alone we can feel until we encounter someone who understands the inconsistent beat of our terrified heart. I know all too often how it feels to be in a room full of thousands of people and still feel so alone. To try and fill that void is a lost cause because, often […]

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I’ve learned this about grief.

  I’ve learned this about grief. It is relentless and unexpected and somehow finds a way to make you feel lost without its presence. It does not care if you just washed your hair and have plans for Saturday night but it never shows up for the pity party you spent your whole month planning. […]

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6 months.

6 months. It’s been 6 months since my daddy left this earth. I try really hard not to put importance on days, but, let’s be honest, dates are often blaring reminders of the best and worst things that have ever happened to us. I refuse to forget about the good in an attempt to ignore […]

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The 25 Years I Was Lucky Enough to Have Don Hutt as My Daddy

  Donald Hutt November 24, 1952 – March 23, 2015 Donald Orval Hutt, 62, of Boise, Idaho, passed away at home March 23, 2015 after a recent bout of medical conditions and a lifelong search to find peace. Don spent his last few months on Earth surrounded by enough love, support, and care to help […]

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An Open Letter to Anyone Planning to Watch “50 Shades of Grey” This Weekend {written by a survivor of sexual abuse}

An open letter to anyone planning on watching 50 Shades of Grey this weekend,   To be completely honest, I’m worried for the release of this movie. I am worried for the fact that this movie glamorizes aggressive sexual encounters, submissive women, and depicts pain, domination, and animalistic confrontations as intimate and desirable. There is […]

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