a softer trip around the sun

This morning, I woke up and took a walk for an hour by myself. My breath felt kind of shallow and no matter how deep I tried to inhale, it felt like it was stunted by something. Shortened. Being pressed back out. I came home and stayed busy; laundry and meal prep, cleaning and chores. […]

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if we choose to look in its direction

I feel like this is what always happens, so I’m sorry if I sound like a broken record (with a few months in between each record playing.) But here I am, writing a stupid blog post just to prove to myself that I can. Just to start and finish something. Just to get some of […]

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When love comes back

I used to hope that there would be fireworks and confetti when love found me again. I begged for some kind of sign that I would be able to see or hear or feel all the screaming yeses promising me that love had really come back around. I practiced noticing the subtle differences between the […]

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the year that made me whole

It’s been a while since I sat down to simply write. Without structure or intention, without plans or expectation. I’ve been avoiding writing this and simultaneously excited for this day to come and go for 365 days now. A year ago to this date, the entire foundation I had built my life upon was completely […]

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let go of your checklist; let love find you

I used to be so certain about what it was I wanted in a significant other. Funny. Smart. Charming. Kind. Driven. Tall. Active. Ambitious. Smart. I had a laundry list I checked off with each person I met, and I often discovered within the first conversation I knew whether or not we’d be riding off […]

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what it means to matter

I remember sitting next to my dad’s bed in the emergency room while nurses and technicians rushed in and out, in and out, in and out. I didn’t notice much of the chaos around me; I just stared at my dad’s chest and held my breath as I begged for him to take another one. […]

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what love isn’t.

When you get your heart broken, if you’re anything like me, you want to figure out what you did wrong immediately in order to make sure none of these same shards of heartbreak ever cut you again. I’ve gone back and analyzed every word, every argument; and every hidden meaning I thought might be intertwined […]

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farewell 2016

  I’ve seen a lot of excitement that 2016 is nearing an end. I’ll admit, I’ve been amongst those people and I’ve been guilty of posting a meme or two praying that the universe doesn’t drop a 2016-S right when we think 2016 is finally over. But I got to thinking a lot about this […]

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cheers to 27

Two years ago to this exact date, I sat upstairs in the guest room of my parent’s house drinking wine alone, writing about 10 important things I had learned in my 25 short years of being alive. I wrote about how my past self would have guaranteed I’d have it all together by 25. A […]

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Tonight, my words are ready.

I have learned that when the words are ready, they will come. Whether you are sitting at your keyboard or sitting in traffic, the words will come and they will claw their way out of you until you let them be heard. Tonight, my words are ready. They are not pretty or decorated with sugar […]

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